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How The Grinch Stole Thanksgiving

Hill Country Living
By Coulter Fussell

Well, that’s wrap on Thanksgiving. As soon as the last slippery deviled egg was carefully picked up from the plate, Christmas rang. And thank goodness because Lane Kiffin utterly sabotaged Thanksgiving. He was the Grinch of cornbread dressing and giblet gravy. He stole our joy.

The entire week of Thanksgiving, from start to finish, was entirely occupied with emotionally reeling from the various and ever-shifting fallouts from this man’s off-field coaching decisions… or indecisions, rather. There were times when I felt I was a relationship coach and was giving my male friends psychological advice and coping strategies that I would typically give a girlfriend who was getting the runaround from a bad partner.

Phrases like “You’re better than him” and “He doesn’t deserve you” and “He’s obviously cheating on you with Auburn” come to mind. Later, I would surmise that maybe he was only wishing he was cheating on them with Auburn.

I can only recall one or two conversations over the course of Thanksgiving Week that didn’t have to do with Lane Kiffin. One was about the exact location of a certain old log cabin in Lafayette County and the other was about Juice, the pet dog of Lane Kiffin. If you envision the famous Normal Rockwell illustration from The Saturday Evening Post depicting the family gathered around the Thanksgiving table and, in your mind’s eye, you put Lane Kiffin where the giant turkey is, then that pretty much sums up Thanksgiving 2022 for Ole Miss fans.

All that to say, I’m quite glad to move on and am hopeful that Lane Kiffin won’t eventually take out Christmas, Valentine’s, Easter and beyond.
There is a lot of non-Lane Kiffin oriented events coming up the next few weeks in Water Valley. This Friday, of course, is the Water Valley Christmas

Parade with its new nighttime setting and even newer backward direction! The parade starts at 6pm and will surely be fun and pretty.
Bozarts Gallery on Main Street is having a reception for their “Holiday Miniature Show” the night of the Christmas Parade so y’all stop on by there and pick yourself up a piece of mini-art.

The very next day there’s an art opening of textile works by Katherine Montague at Bill Warren and Pati D’Amico’s “Gallery in the Green Room” (200 Panola Street.) Katherine is a talented local quilter and a teacher at DES. Some of you may recall that she sewed hundreds of masks during Covid and, with the help and direction of Cinnamon Foster, gave them out for free to all the businesses in town. All you seamstresses out there know what a feat that is. Katherine’s opening is from 6 – 9pm on December 3rd.
And then the next week on Friday, December 9th we’ll have “Christmas in the Valley” with Frosty and the snow machine and the carriage rides! The Water Valley Main Street Association is sponsoring a “Cookie Stroll” which sounds especially enticing.

I am personally requesting that Lane Kiffin stay away from any of these events. Juice can still come, though.

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