Miss Maggie Was Star Of The Parade
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Hill Country Living
By Coulter Fussell
The Water Valley Christmas Parade was great again, and the little fluffy black dog who drove the tiny red car stole the entire show. It’s been collectively confirmed by many parade goers that the tiny fluffy driving dog was the main event. That dog should be our town mascot. And here I was thinking that last year’s parade was special with a 12-year-old driving a sports car! Nope. Why have a driving child when you can have a driving dog? Good question. Next year: a driving fish. Make it happen, someone.
I heard that the little fluffy dog’s name is Maggie and that she works at Magnolia Formal Wear. Since Lane Kiffin suddenly laid claim to Juice Kiffin in the big break-up and seems to have established custody to some questionable degree, I’m placing Maggie the Driving Dog in the hole in my heart that used to house Juice. Sometimes things happen for a reason: Juice was kidnapped to Louisiana to break our hearts so that Maggie could drive down Main Street in Water Valley and have us fall in love. And here we are, all better for it.
Speaking of, the College Football Playoffs are Saturday in Oxford. Never did I think I would see this day! But I’ll be there somewhere in the stadium stands. Around the end of the third quarter, I’ll start having some retroactive waitress anxiety conditioned into me from my years as a server on the Square.
The first game is football; the second game is how Oxford handles it. Those Oxford restaurants will have to serve the biggest sporting event in Mississippi history on Saturday while being understaffed due to school being out for Christmas break. Some of the smart servers may have stuck around for the tips, but I imagine the kitchen staff ran for the hills, as would I in their position.
All this to say, be good to your restaurant staff in Oxford this weekend. Or, better yet, don’t eat in Oxford at all! This is an excellent weekend to eat at any of our fine establishments in good ol’ Water Valley!
I would be remiss if I didn’t comment on the current weather in Water Valley. As I write this column, it is 18 degrees outside due to a polar vortex. Is this a new thing? I really don’t feel like I remember polar vortexes happening when I was a kid. Seems like I would remember something that sounds like a comic book villain’s lethal superpower he can create by spinning in place. Yet another reason that the ’80s and ’90s were the superior decades: no polar vortexes. And no LED light bulbs.
Last thing, don’t forget to shop local this year! We have a lot of shops and several galleries that would love to sell you a Christmas gift or three. Go get a hot coffee from one of the coffee shops and cruise around Main Street. I guarantee you’ll find a good gift and also guarantee you’ll feel like a good citizen when you do.
