Cereus Energy Should Be Strong Here
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Hill Country Living
By Coulter Fussell
I would love to give y’all a run-down of all the fun things that happened in Water Valley over the last couple of weeks but, truth be told, I have either been out of town on work related trips or on my sofa doing armchair detective work related to the whereabouts of Carlee Russell. If you don’t know who Carlee Russell is – then I would like to officially welcome you to Earth and I hope you enjoy your stay here.
I would also like to tell you that she is the young lady who fake-saw a toddler on the interstate in Hoover, Ala. after getting real Mediterranean food and then went fake-missing, ate real Cheezits, maybe-fake stayed at a Red Roof Inn, and really walked home two days later.
I was glad to get the opportunity to solve this case from my sofa, and I assume the FBI used their cyber-tech resources to read all my very astute and insightful text messages to family and friends containing my theories and predications on Carlee’s whereabouts and reasonings.
The Carlee Russell case filled an emptiness I’d felt ever since the South Carolina Murdaugh trial wrapped up. I also solved that one. I’m just saying, if the Yalobusha County Sherriff’s department ever needs an extra detective for some reason or another, they know who to call.
In watermelon news, it’s everyone’s collective favorite time of the year: Watermelon time! The trucks of watermelons are cruising through town and I see that Hannah McCormick (local jane-of-all-trades in anything art related) has done it again! The annual window decoration for Turnage’s is a masterpiece, as always. Be sure to drive by and check out the prescription watermelon pills Hannah painted on Turnage’s front window. She even gave them little highlights to render a reflective quality as if the capsule-shaped melons are truly contained within individual plastic pill casings. Some melons are in tablet form. I agree that watermelons are a terrific remedy for a variety of ailments.
In house plant news, my Night Blooming Cereus has finally, after five years, developed its first blooms. This plant, which was given to me in 2018 as a small four-inch cutting stuck into a tiny pot of dirt, is now the size of Audrey 2 from “Little Shop of Horrors.” It’s unable to fit inside my home and is now completely porch-bound. My mother had a Night Blooming Cereus for years that was so well attended by her as to have the standing of another sibling in my family, complete with its own room.
Water Valley’s own local famed author, Hubert Creekmore, was in a Night Blooming Cereus social club with writer Eudora Welty, so I imagine the Cereus energy is strong in this town.
Night Blooming Cereuses typically develop several giant blooms very quickly and then bloom only once a year, and even then, for only one single night! The annual nocturnal blooms last for mere hours. So, all of you plant people know how exciting this is!
I’m socially and ecologically obligated to throw an impromptu party on the night it begins to bloom. By morning, it will all be over and the mysterious blooms will be gone like Carlee Russell. I’ll report my findings as to their whereabouts next week.
